Steven Wright

United States
Born on 6 Dec 1955
Comedian

I can remember the first time I had to go to sleep.
Mom said, 'Steven, time to go to sleep.'
I said, 'But I don't know how.'
She said, 'It's real easy. Just go down to the end of tired and hang a left.'
So I went down to the end of tired, and just out of curiosity I hung a right.
My mother was there, and she said 'I thought I told you to go to sleep.'
.


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On Anger: "For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind."
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